Louise & John
After nearly forty years together we knew we wanted to rid our relationship of past issues and resentments and find a fresh and positive way of enjoying whatever time we have left together. We also faced changes brought by retirement and bereavement. Having tried on numerous occasions over the years to unravel the things that challenged us, we both felt we needed external support. Karen was highly recommended by a person we both trusted but despite that, we were both fairly sceptical about the process though we ery much hoped it would help us attain our hope of living more kindly with each other.
Over a period of seven months we met weekly with Karen who initially took great care to learn about us as individuals and to look at the dynamics between us both past and present. Often our sessions were difficult and emotionally charged and the process was far from easy but Karen had warned us that things may get worse before they got better.
Having established an environment of safety and trust, gradually we were able to talk to Karen and to each other about the parts of our relationship that were negative and destructive. We told each other things that had never been put into words before and we were helped to really listen to each other's points of view. Throughout the process we both remarked on how much we didn't know about each other, despite having spent a lifetime together.
We were looking for help with techniques to moderate our behaviour to each other and to avoid the pitfalls of learned behaviour, just doing the same things we had always done, despite knowing they were often negative and damaging. Karen was expert in providing these techniques and coaching us in their use.
Karen had the skills and ability to never make either of us feel we were to blame or that our behaviours and responses were wrong or bad. She was able to identify the areas where decades of conflict had eroded our respect and feelings for each other and ultimately, gave us every hope that we can maintain and enjoy each other in a relationship of understanding, acceptance and kindness.
Now that the initial and intense period of therapy has reached a natural conclusion, we will be meeting with Karen from time to time to review our situation and seek further assistance as and when necessary.
We would without hesitation recommend Karen to anyone considering looking for relationship therapy. We are both thankful that we finally committed to using her experience and skills to move us forward into the next phase of our lives together.
Louise & John Aged 58 & 68
I am immensely grateful to Louise & John for taking such time and care to write this detailed testimonial. Their names have been changed to preserve annonymity.